Tag: jesus

What Are You Going To Do?

It was a question I did not want to hear and definitely did not want to answer.

We had some friends over for dinner last night. Mom was entertaining the five year old and the other adults were telling God stories at the table.

Tim recounted how we met and fell in love. He told the story of how we came to this church and how God has been using us. Our guest told stories too about how big and awesome our God is.

I was quiet and then said that I found this conversation convicting. I recently found out someone I know has cancer and is now home on hospice. I wrote her a note and recounted memories of times together. Everyone wants to know they made a difference and were seen.

But I made no mention of God, salvation or eternal life.

My guest asked the poignant question, “So, what are you going to do?” I didn’t know. They said I could write another card or call or stop by. Stop by? What? Like unannounced? To drop in on someone I haven’t seen in years when they are in a delicate state? That takes another level of confidence I don’t have.

So, my wise husband then suggested I ask the Holy Spirit.

Whew! That’s another truth I needed to hear.

If I say I am a Christian, I follow Christ, I believe that there is an eternal life spent in hell or heaven, why wouldn’t I want to tell others?

Because I’ve believed a lie. It’s not my ‘calling.’ It’s not my ‘gifting.’ I’ve followed the fear.

The truth is that we are all called to be the light in the world. We are to be like Jesus. Well, He definitely went around telling people about eternal life.

Again – let’s go back to what I know to be true. If God is for us, who can be against us? The Lord hasn’t given me a spirit of fear – but one of love, power and a sound mind. He will never leave me. He is always with me and promises to meet my needs. He directs my steps. He gives me the words.

Alright – I am moving forward. Help my unbelief!

So, my friend, what are YOU going to do?

Commitment or Perfection?

Leadership expert John C. Maxwell states he is a writer so he writes everyday.

Really? Every day?!?!?

When I checked to see how many books he has written, I got several answers. One said 130, another said 203 and yet another said 860!

Whichever is correct, this much is true. The man writes! He is committed to it.

But does this make him perfect?

When I read stories of great people in the Bible, I tend to ‘perfectionize’ them. I see Noah building that ark day after day after day – never getting tired or taking a day off. I see Solomon building the temple never wavering in his commitment to finish. I see Paul traveling from town to town preaching the gospel and never resting from speaking or his writing.

But is this true? No. They were human like us. They grew weary and tired. They were frustrated and had doubts too.

But they were committed to God. They were not perfect in their commitment. But they were committed.

I’ve been committed to Tim for over 18 years now. Have I been perfect in that commitment? Have I honored him 100% of the time? No. Yet, I am committed.

I say that God has called me to write and yet I waiver on being committed to writing. But, maybe I’m trying to be perfect.

But once again, God has not called me to perfection. He has asked me to trust and obey Him.

So, again, I start anew. Another day, take another step forward. Just keep moving.

Thank you, Lord, for your faithfulness, for forgiveness, for fresh starts. Help my unbelief!

How Many Rocks Do You Carry?

In one of my small group seasons, a leader was discussing forgiveness. I didn’t think I needed this lesson because I was sure I was not harboring any bad feelings toward anyone. It didn’t take me long to discover, however, that once again, I was wrong.

She began by describing offense as the bait used by the enemy to lure us into bondage.

My interest was piqued. I definitely don’t like giving the enemy any ground and do not want to exist in bondage. I want to live in freedom.

She said forgiveness was not minimizing what happened or even forgetting what happened. I really thought it was to forgive and forget. I thought that made me more spiritual. (Roll eyes here.)

Forgiveness allows us to remember the event without reliving the pain associated with the event. That was a big statement because there is some pretty big pain in this world.

Forgiveness also isn’t reconciliation. Romans 12:18 says, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” You can only control you. You cannot control the other person. Trust the Holy Spirit to lead you as to whether to even attempt reconciliation.

Some of my group members had to leave the relationship. Others reconciled. Still others are living with daily, constant, reoccurring pain because the offender is still in their life. The Holy Spirit leads and not everyone is led to the same decision.

Towards the end of our group time, my leader brought out a bag of rocks. She instructed us to take rocks equal to the number of people we needed to forgive in our lives. We were to carry that bag with us every where we went.

Pulling out that bag of rocks from my purse when I needed my wallet was fun. Oh, the looks I got! The weight of it lightened every time I chose to forgive someone and threw away the rock.

I recently revisited this object lesson. But instead of a bag of rocks, I chose a small pebble. It’s not a smooth river rock. It has multiple sharp edges. I put it in my sock.

At first, it was very uncomfortable. It jabbed me even when I wasn’t walking.

However, within a short amount of time, I became used to it and didn’t feel it anymore. It just was something to carry with me, like extra baggage.

When we don’t forgive others, it can become part of our identity. We don’t even realize the damage or heaviness. It attaches to us and if we don’t address it, becomes a brick in the wall that surrounds our heart. It may keep us from getting hurt – but also keeps up from being loved and known.

That little pebble left its mark – whether I felt the pain or not. It left an indentation on my foot. I’m sure eventually, it would have cut the skin.

Living with unforgiveness leaves a mark. We can become numb to the pain quite quickly and distracted by other things. However, left unaddressed, it will rob us of our joy, our hope and our confidence. We won’t trust people from the start.

When we choose to forgive them, we release that person from a yoke. This yoke is only around our own necks. We are freed from the weight we are carrying. We begin to walk in freedom.

Dear friend, take a moment and think about who you need to forgive. Have an open and honest conversation with God. Tell Him what happened. Give Him your pain. Tell Him of your desire to forgive the person. Choose to forgive – say it, out loud. Choices lead – feelings follow.

However – if you decide you do NOT want to forgive this person, find a rock and carry it around. Or put a sharp pebble in your sock. The Lord wants your rocks. But He’ll let you carry them as long as you want to. Then it will be yours to manage.

Looking Back. Looking Ahead.

Wow! Year ending in less than 2 hours (CST.)

I have to look back and reflect on my year. I see the good and the not so much. I see the progress and the still to do. I look at pictures and remember the smiles and the belly laughs. I also remember the empty chairs and people no longer here.

Life changes so very quickly sometimes. It’s hard and messy. It’s wonderful and amazing. Which are you focused on?

I have to deal with the hard stuff and the messes that follow. But I also want to wonder and to be amazed at something every day of 2024. That is going to take intentionality. I will have to really search some days for something that is wonderful, that is worth smiling about.

But I can always look up. God is good. He never changes. Never loves me less. He is constant. Is present. Is with me. Thank you, Lord.

Definitely worth smiling about.